PEACE OF MIND – What’s Your Version? By Julie Kelly

Every day we hear people say how important it is to have peace of mind. For some people, peace of mind means having a job that’s consistent and secure . For others, peace of mind means a health condition being resolved or settling. There are so many examples and definitions of peace of mind.  But what does peace of mind really mean to you?

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THE CRYING MIND – The Benefits of Crying Without Shame by Julie Kelly

 

As a stress consultant and healer, I’m often presented with people in distress. Crying and tears have become a huge part of my work and I must confess, my personal life too. Did you notice the wording there? I said “I must confess” – as  if crying’s some kind of horrible sin.

Crying tears cleansing peace inner resting frustration emotion salt saline anti bacterial physical mental spiritual health letting go

You see, in our culture we’re encouraged not to cry. Crying is seen as weakness & embarrassing. we’ve all had it said to us “come on now stop crying, pull yourself together ” and we even bring gender into it. Seriously! If you’re a woman crying is bad enough, but if you’re a man it’s an absolute no-no to cry. A sign of weakness, not being manly and masculine enough. And yet, crying is the one real action of our body that connects us emotionally.

To cry is not only human response to sorrow or frustration, it’s also a really healthy one. It’s actually evidenced, crying reduces stress and helps us to eliminate the feelings that come with that frustration. Crying helps us to calm our mind and body and this has a huge physical knock-on effect.

It’s common knowledge, holding in stress overlong periods of time can increase the risk of heart problems and other disorders such as acid & cancers etc. Other benefits of crying include:

  • Helping us connect with others in terms of support.
  • Helping to relieve pain. …
  • Enhancing mood. …
  • Releasing toxins and relieving stress. …
  • Aiding sleep. …
  • Fighting bacteria. …
  • Improving vision.

Let’s not forget, tears are made up of a compound of salt and water-the best anti bacterial there is. In Biblical times, Mary Magdalen was said to have washed the feet of Jesus with her tears.

Whether you believe the story or not, the message behind it cannot be ignored. Human tears are definitely a strong anti bacterial cleanser. So why as a culture, are we so opposed to crying? Maybe it’s because looking inwards at our own problems & deficits is much more difficult than looking outwards at someone else’s and so, for us to cry being ‘normal’ would be unthought of.

Which brings us back to the power of mind & meditation. To be able to connect and truly be at peace with our mind, we must first learn to bring the mind to a place of stillness. The only way we can achieve this is through meditation.

Through meditation we can begin to acknowledge and understand the nature of who we are, our emotions as they arise & our imbalances. Whilst meditation teaches that we shouldn’t give too much attention to our emotion, for example creating a dialogue and engaging with it.

There’s absolutely no reason why, when emotion arises where tears need to flow, we shouldn’t allow them too.

WHAT ARE YOUR EXPERIENCES OF CRYING?

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WHEN FORGIVENESS CURES – A Personal Story By Julie Kelly

What’s the point of forgiveness? After all, doesn’t it let the wrongdoer off the hook? The last thing we want to do when someone harms, hurts or even kills someone we love  – is forgive.  So why, is there so much emphasis on the power of forgiveness? And how can it benefit our Mental Health?

This is my personal story……In my 40s I met a man and fell in love. Not something I planned, nor was I looking for a life partner but we met and clicked instantly.  We had similar tastes in music because we both came from the same era. Morrissey, the sex pistols, the clash all of those groups and musicians who came up through the 80s, so you see – we had a lot in common.

As our relationship grew, like many couples we planned a future together. He had his own place, I had mine and every weekend we’d get together and enjoy our time. One Sunday evening – and I keep wondering to myself looking back, was there anything different about that evening? Did anything happen that I could’ve picked up on? Was there anything remarkable? The answer was always no, but that Sunday evening was the last time I saw my partner alive.

Months before, he’d taken in a lodger, someone to go halves with the rent and bills. Many of us have done it, nothing unusual there right? What he didn’t know, was the person he took in as a lodger, would eventually kill him in a knife attack leaving 17 stab wounds on his body. Receiving the news that the man I loved had been killed, devastated me to the core. In that moment my body froze and I couldn’t warm it up, it was a moment when as a non drinker, I desperately needed whiskey, something – anything.

If I’d only known, if I said I love you just a little bit more meaningfully, if I’d made more of an effort on that last weekend, but I didn’t. So where do you turn in moments like this?

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INVISIBLE REALITY – By Julie Kelly

 This post may for some, be a controversial one because in some ways, it challenges our whole way of thinking.  You see, I find myself wondering how – if an illness is invisible, do we know it’s real?

Some may argue, we know because of the feeling. We feel unwell, so therefore we know the illness exists. But let’s look at the statement in more detail, let’s break it down and really consider things with an open mind.

Ok… Here we have someone with an invisible illness. This must in effect mean it can’t be seen.

 If you describe something as invisible, you meanthat it cannot be seen, for example because it is transparent, hidden, or very small. 

https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/invisible

This brings me to the question, is it only invisible to the outside world? Or to the person experiencing it? If it’s only to the outside world, then this is something to really sympathise with.

Can you imagine being able to see your illness, sickness or disease, knowing its there yet nobody else can see what you can? Absolutely awful.

On the other hand, if it’s also invisible to the sufferer (I mean if you can’t see it) Then how  do we actually know what we are linking our feelings to? Of course when we have an illness, sickness or imbalance we feel completely out of sorts, off-colour. We know we are ill by the way we feel.  Nobody can take those feelings away from us, because we know how we feel personally. But here we are talking about an illness that is described as being invisible-something we can’t see. So if that illness was invisible to the sufferer, how does that person know what he or she feels is connected to the illness? 

 I guess what I’m trying to say, or at least create a debate about, is whether much of what we experience and feel is created in the mind and our perception?

What are your thoughts?

Please Leave Your Comments & Share to See What Others Think 💖

INVISIBLE REALITY – By Julie Kelly

 This post may for some, be a controversial one because in some ways, it challenges our whole way of thinking.  You see, I find myself wondering how – if an illness is invisible, do we know it’s real?

Some may argue, we know because of the feeling. We feel unwell, so therefore we know the illness exists. But let’s look at the statement in more detail, let’s break it down and really consider things with an open mind.

Ok… Here we have someone with an invisible illness. This must in effect mean it can’t be seen.

 If you describe something as invisible, you meanthat it cannot be seen, for example because it is transparent, hidden, or very small. 

https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/invisible

This brings me to the question, is it only invisible to the outside world? Or to the person experiencing it? If it’s only to the outside world, then this is something to really sympathise with.

Can you imagine being able to see your illness, sickness or disease, knowing its there yet nobody else can see what you can? Absolutely awful.

On the other hand, if it’s also invisible to the sufferer (I mean if you can’t see it) Then how  do we actually know what we are linking our feelings to? Of course when we have an illness, sickness or imbalance we feel completely out of sorts, off-colour. We know we are ill by the way we feel.  Nobody can take those feelings away from us, because we know how we feel personally. But here we are talking about an illness that is described as being invisible-something we can’t see. So if that illness was invisible to the sufferer, how does that person know what he or she feels is connected to the illness? 

 I guess what I’m trying to say, or at least create a debate about, is whether much of what we experience and feel is created in the mind and our perception?

What are your thoughts?

Please Leave Your Comments & Share to See What Others Think 💖