About easternhealingroom

Buddhist Scholar & Eastern Healer. I'm alive today because in my world 'Laughter is Law!' - Many weren't so fortunate.


We all have times when we think “Why Me?” To be honest, for some of us it sounds like a pretty reasonable question. 

We’ve got all kinds of bills dropping through the letterbox, partners who don’t respect us and to top it all, poor health.  Not all of us have religion to turn to or even a faith to trust but even for those who do, it still begs the question “Why Me?”

Why? Questions life asking wondering deserving image perspective karma


Why have I had such a hard life?

How come everyone in my family did well except me?

What have I done to deserve this kind of life?

Why do I have all these health problems?

Why does it feel like the world’s against me?

The following two questions if answered honestly & frankly, can be completely life changing. They’re life changing because once you grasp the reasoning behind them, it’ll change your whole thought process. Remember! You must be absolutely honest with yourself.


Question 1) Do I see myself as a decent kind of person?

Question 2) Can I think of anything I’ve done, that would make me deserve the awful things that happen to me?



 Here I’ll leave you to ponder these questions and tomorrow I’ll try to change your whole perspective on life.

Please LIKE SHARE AND COMMENT – See you soon โค๏ธ๐ŸŒนโค๏ธ



It never used to be the case, but these days when I’m asked about my greatest strengths, I reply “Being a Dangerous Woman”

Dangerous confidence confident bold committed colour conviction faith voice empowerment empowered women standing subservience courage experience life choice age belief faith

This usually takes people by suprise but it’s true for many reasons and there are a lot of us around too. You see, over the years I’ve been preparing for this without even realising it – but now I know for sure how dangerous I truly am. 

So why do I class myself as a dangerous woman? Well when I hit my 50s, something happened to me pretty much overnight. Maybe the menopause had something to do with it but I became fearless. My mind opened up a new sense of clarity and awareness of why I exist today right here right now.

It became clear to me, that every experience I’ve had in life, every struggle & hardship (and believe me there have been many) has brought me to this place where I now deserve at the very least – respect for surviving. 

This realisation is what also made me fearless. Fearless of losing material things, Fearless of voicing my opinions, Fearless of having a voice and being heard, Fearless of being ridiculed, Fearless of getting old, Fearless of being alone with my thoughts and Fearless of having those thoughts, Fearless of standing in queues for longer than needed, just until I get eye contact from rude shop assistants who hand me my change without acknowledging me. When I do get eye contact, I simply smile and thank them but it gives me a sense of purpose to know I didn’t disrespect myself enough to accept the rudeness. Fearless of using colour on my clothes and hair whenever I want to and feeling comfortable in my own skin.

But how does this make me a dangerous woman you might ask? 

Well in a nutshell people don’t always like it. You see, we live in a society where we’re supposed to conform and obey and it’s true, in many cases we don’t have too much choice. But governments and stressed out bosses don’t want people like me who challenge 

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Ok so you’re probably wondering “What the heck is Compassion Fatigue?” Not another new buzz word flying around to get us all worked into a frenzy! I must admit, that’s exactly what went through my mind, until I looked deeper and realised something quite profound as I’m sure many of my readers will….

Compassion fatigue love self care respect cleansing giving taking exhausted exasperated rest relaxing peace health healing 
Recently, a very dear friend Elles Lohuis ph.D sent me a video clip by a woman called Juliette Watt.
Juliet is a world renowned professional and inspirational speaker, with too many personal accolades to even begin listing. Anyway, Juliette played a huge part in treating rescued animals caught up in hurricane Katrina amongst numerous other achievements in her life.
Now according to Juliette, her mission is about making a massive impact and helping people create the life of their dreams.
In her own words: 
“I want to help people who have lost themselves in who they’ve been for everyone else.” 
To cut a long story short, the clip was about something called ‘compassion fatigue’ and it was sent when I was going through some pretty deep personal issues. I have to say, it really changed my way of thinking. 
Compassion fatigue isn’t something I’d heard of before, but after listening to the talk I realised I’d been  suffering from it for years, just as I’m sure some of you will have. So what exactly is compassion fatigue?
Well as I understand, compassion fatigue is the exhaustion we feel from constantly giving to others, whilst forgetting to give to ourselves. That’s the short version, and it really resonates with me personally.
You see, like many of you I was raised to be courteous, to always put others first, be respectful at all times and turn the other cheek. So naturally, these wonderful values followed me into adulthood but the bit they missed out – how to replenish the mind and body after all that effort.
This is the bit we didn’t get taught and if you like, the bit we never realiased we needed to learn. After listening to Juliette’s talk, it inspired me to take a really deep analytical look at some of my own quite serious personal issues.
As an experienced meditator, meditation was the way I chose to really analyse myself, my thought processes & my behaviours but even with all this experience, what I discovered absolutely floored me.  Putting that aside for a moment though, one thing I have discovered is I’m not the only one who’s been struggling for years with this, there are literally millions of us.
All through my life, people close to me have said, “You always seem to choose relationships with needy people”  To a point, they aren’t wrong either. It’s true – I’m attracted to people who need help with their own lives, mental health, addiction – well anything really that takes the emphasis away from me. I’m like a vulnerability magnet, people with problems can spot me from a 1000 mile radius or so it seems. So in effect the accusations or observations are true, I spend loads of time helping them back into better health and lifestyle only to find they don’t need me so much afterwards. 
The question is….where do we draw the line at acceptable & unacceptable vulnerability & need? After all – we all have these things don’t we? Even the most influential & famous people have vulnerabilities and needs so why are some considered acceptable and others not?
Now I’ve come to realise a very important thing since doing all this analyzing. The problem doesn’t lie with the people I attract or accept into my life, the issue lies with me and the fact all my energies are directed outwardly with none coming back to replenish myself. 
Even a car needs petrol, oil & water to continue functioning well but we humans seem to think we’re invincible and then wonder why we get sick and diseased from all kinds of things. There’s nothing wrong with helping or guiding people to stand on their feet and get back on track – as long as we hand back the reins and power afterwards. 
Just for a moment, consider these 2 scenarios and see if any resonate with you….
1 – You raise your children the best you can, holding down a full time job and juggling childcare just so they don’t want for anything. They have all the designer gear, they’re popular in school because they fit in and you do your best to make sure that continues. As they get older, they fall in with friends you’re not happy with but you take all necessary steps to make sure they’re safe. Mobile phones to call home, lots of credit on the phone, some cash in their pocket in case of emergencies etc. But they never really call and if you call they make it short. The cash goes on weed with their mates who all love you and wish their mum was like you. Then it’s phone calls from the police or they get arrested and it’s 


So you’re probably wondering…What makes today different? Why should today be celebrated more than any other? You’ve missed the point my friend!

It isn’t that today is any more special, beautiful or spectacular than the rest – you just forgot to notice that’s all. So here are 3 Incredible reasons to celebrate today!

Celebrate love appreciate spectacular amazing change life death knowledge wisdom
  1. We Exist – Hard as it is to imagine, all across the world last night people went to bed in the usual way, kissed loved ones goodnight, set the alarm ready for work and never woke up. Nothing remarkable about the night – it was simply their last. Their very last chance to witness a new day. To hear the birds sing or walk amongst trees. Their very last night to see the treasures all around them and they never even knew. In fact, to be even more realistic, it was their last opportunity to work themselves into the ground for that house they rarely lived in, the retirement plans they never got to see come into fruition, or the old age they were saving for that never came. Today Celebrate Life! ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿ™
  2. We Are Able – Here we are, reading this post with reasonably good vision, and a body healthy enough to function in the days to come. We’re fortunate to have the gift of opportunity to use this day in whichever way we like. It’s your life for the taking – (well at least for today) We can waste it and hope we get chance of another, or we can celebrate the hell out of it. It’s our choice – let’s be grateful for that choice. Today Celebrate Opportunity! ๐ŸŽค๐Ÿšต๐Ÿ›€
  3. We Are Remarkable – You are remarkable! With so many gifts to offer this world why not make today, the best of them all? We have the power of speech – let’s use it on someone who may be lonely. Someone once told me “You never know in this lifetime how many lives you may have saved” it’s true. Today might not only be the most spectacular for you,but for someone else too because of your actions – How awesome is that? Today Celebrate Compassion โค๏ธ Wisdom! โœ๐Ÿ˜ข๐Ÿ˜‚

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WHY WE HURT By Julie Kelly

Have you ever wondered why some people suffer the effects of trauma & others simply move on? Why some carry past experiences from childhood into adulthood & others refuse – closing the door on the past? We’ve all pondered these things….”Why me? Why does it always seem to be me who suffers?” Well first it’s important to understand how the mind works, and we’ll do it by going on a journey into outer space. When the mind is peaceful we experience vast quiet space – so it seems a great place to start.

Clinging sadness pain intolerance letting go attachment and consciousness consciousness subconsciousness powerful mind brain

So let’s begin right down in the deepest recesses of the mind –


Have you ever heard of Fight Flight or Freeze? It’s the response we have in the most difficult circumstances. For example, let’s say we get mugged in the street at gunpoint, the chances are we’re not going to put up too much of a fight in case we get shot.

Most of us would hand over our things and try to stay alive – we’d probably take flight and have that memory frozen in time somewhere so we didn’t have to deal with it. The unconscious mind is a bit like a filing system where all our traumatic memories get stored. It’s safe and secure and won’t let you down. Whilst your memories are there, you can get on with life as if nothing happened.

That’s why soldiers who’ve seen the most horrendous things don’t fall and crumble. It’s why they carry on regardless in war without faltering and why everyday people seem to have extraordinary resilience in terrible situations………..BUT THERES A CATCH! The

unconscious part of your mind is only good until another part of the mind gets stimulated and sends a message that it’s safe to let go.

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